There exist two traditions here at Ye Olde Vacant Nebula: a long, introspective blog post on my birthday, and a long, retrospective blog post at the beginning of the new year. What you are reading is the latter. As I noted at the begenning of twenty-leven, my blogging frequency has dropped precipitously. (I only wrote twenty posts this year.) As such, this long, retrospective blog post may be merely a retrospective blog post.

My blogging has tended more toward the technical and geeky this year. I detailed the code I wrote to generate gradient images, shared my thoughts on how to write SQL queries, wrote not
once but twice on HTML5 video, provided password tips for non-geeks, compared online backup services, and closed the year by sharing my process to creat photo mosaics.

For the more family-oriented content on this blog, I posted pictures from our trip to Disney World, Emma’s third birthday, a trip to the beach, Grayson’s first birthday, Emma’s first day of preschool, our trip to Dollywood, and Halloween. I also posted a ton of videos all at once.

Some other odds and ends: my thoughts on Donkey Kong Country Returns, some comments on what it’s like living near a race track, the obligitory birthday blog post, and a follow-up review of Anathem.

All in all a pretty good year. Too bad a Mayan version of the Y2K bug is going to somehow tear the world apart in twenty-twelve. Or so they say. Happy New Year!

Well it is a new year and, just like the last six years, I am going to kick off the year with a look back on my last year of blogging. But first, a graph! As you will see below, I haven’t been blogging nearly as much as I used to. I still haven’t gone an entire calendar month without making a post yet, but I’ve come close. At one point I planned to write something on a regular schedule—either M/W/F or M/Th or something like that. Then I had kids.

But I digress; time to recap my year of blogging. One of my first posts discussed the difficulty of teaching Emma pronouns. (She has mastered them by now). We got a few opportunities to play in the snow. I decided to say goodbye to The Simpsons, and I found a Bizarro Kip out there.

Then some big news came out when we discovered that the baby in my wife’s belly was a boy. Then we had another parenting moment when our adorable little girl entered her terrible twos. (So far they haven’t really been all that terrible.) When Stephanie and I celebrated our fifth anniversary, Stephanie posted a really long post looking back on those five years. I made a personal goal to lose some weight. I’ve pretty much kept to my plan. I quickly lost twenty pounds, but I’ve put ten of them back on. I’m planning to add some new items to the list in the new year. The biggest change, of course, was when Grayson Matthew Robinson arrived on July fifteenth.

I also gave out some random advice along the way: how to evaluate Mexican restaurants, how to better tie your shoe laces, and how to win at hangman, the Cracker Barrel peg game, and tic-tac-toe. I let you guys know what I thought of Metroid: Other M. (It wasn’t that great.) Stephanie and I went to our first high school reunions, where I realized that people lose their accents in my memories. I also discussed how my handwriting has changed since high school.

We also took Emma trick-or-treating as a bumblebee. She had a blast. I played around with my new DSLR camera, sharing pictures of the moon and a bonfire. I also made some pretty cool-looking high-resolution panoramas. The end of the year brought about an election season, and I turned the focus of this blog onto a poorly-worded campaign ad, which single-handedly destroyed a politician’s career. (And you thought blogging was a waste of time.) And of course the year ended with my first white Christmas. Maybe it makes me a racist, but I now think white Christmases are the best kind.

At various points throughout the year I used this site to give away some free code and programming tips. I gave away code to generate a collage thumbnail image, improved code to generate gradient images, a mini webapp to perform powerful search-and-replace operations, and code to update your Twitter status using OAuth in PHP. I also shared
a haiku for web developers.

And I guess that’s most everything that I talked about on this blog this year. Happy New Year everyone!

Just like the last four years, the beginning of a new year on Vacant Nebula is marked by a look back at the posts of the previous year. I’m not sure if anyone else gets anything out of these posts, but I enjoy making them because there are so many things that I forget about. So let’s see what all we have been posting about.

Early in the year I made several small changes to this site. Then we got some snow. On Valentine’s Day I left Stephanie at home and went to Mexico. While I was gone Emma walked for the first time. Emma continued to get older, eventually celebrating her first birthday.

Two days before Emma’s birthday, though, I was laid off from my job at Dassault Systemés. Which meant I had to do some job hunting, and I had to figure out what to do with my old business cards. Fortunately I found a new job and started after only five weeks of unemployment.

During those five weeks, I started tweeting and went to the beach. I am very thankful that things worked out so well, especially as the unemployment rate continued to rise all year.

As spring turned to summer, I commented on pickup-truck-bed meat dealers and wrote a program to resize desktop wallpapers. I posted a conversation I had with someone at Sprint, who may or may not be a terminator. I also read the best book I’ve ever read.

As autumn arrived, I poked fun at a lady I heard on the radio. (She actually e-mailed me to defend herself, but what she said really reinforced my point.) I told you where to hide your cash, but I guess I should have come up with a place to hide ideas because Coca-Cola stole my idea.

The last few months of the year have been very busy at work, and as a result this blog wasn’t very busy. I did manage to post about Emma’s first Halloween outing, as well as my own aging. To finish out the year I posted some good bad writing and a high-quality video from my new digital camera.

Throughout the year, I reviewed a few things: Prince of Persia, Shadow of the Colossus, Netflix/Blockbuster (part 2), Anathem, and a SumoLounge bean bag chair.  I also gave out some free code: PHP code to create a gradient PNG, Java code to handle arbitrarily large fractions, and (if you don’t mind extracting it from a JAR file) Java code to resize images.

I hope everyone has had a great year and looks forward to twenty-ten!

Today I ran across what might possibly be the only cool Facebook app I’ve ever seen. It takes random Facebook status messages from 2009 and makes a collage of them. I thought mine was very interesting:

In longstanding Vacant Nebula tradition, I am kicking off the new year with a look back at what happened here over the last year.1

We came into the year in the midst of a writer’s strike, which allowed us to experience new reality shows.  Then, we decided to formally provide a Vacant Nebula Statement Of (dis)Integrity.  (I’m still waiting on free stuff to start flowing in.)  We also came into the year with a pregnant Stephanie, and we went on a final just-the-two-of-us vacation in Atlanta. Then, I had a few months to kill until Emma arrived, so I tried my hand at drawing maps from memory, which didn’t go so well.  I broke a delivery at work, which led to a few less-than-awesome meetings before everything was sorted out.  I studied eclipses, and now I have plans for August 21, 2017.  Mark your calendars!  I also got my name mentioned by (a blog hosted by) The New York Times, and made a few observations about the upcoming Firefox 3. (Wow, it feels like I have always had Firefox 3, but it was only nine months ago!)

And then life changed when Stephanie decided she was tired of being pregnant and ready to be a mom, something that comes with its own holiday.  I wrote some words and posted some pictures concerning the momentous arrival of our very own Emma Leigh.  Over the year, Stephanie would make a few posts about the experiences of motherhood.  Of course, life must go on and eventually we got some more uneventful posts, like when someone I’m almost kind of related to was briefly on national television, or that time I tried out Facebook and learned that I actually don’t hate it.  Then I said something controversial and soon after retracted it (the first and thus far only time anything posted here has been retracted).

We went on our annual beach trip, and took some photos while we were there.  Over the summer I delighted you with some awesome stuff, and then to get everyone ready for international athletics I posted a schedule of the Beijing Olympics.  True story: if I look at the statistics for number of visitors to this site, and August 8 or August 9 are included in the graph, the rest of the graph is a flat line rounded to zero.  Apparently having a page titled “2008 Beijing Summer Olympics TV Schedule” posted the day the Olympics started will nab you quite a few hits from search engines.

As the summer cooled down, so did the economy.  I found out I won’t have my job much longer, and gas prices soared to new heights, leading to awkward conversations about gas.  Then it was time for an election which later inspired some reflection.  Then to finish out the year, I commented on my long-overdue completion of the Narnia books and took a long Christmas vacation.

Along the way, I also reviewed a few games, and posted way more pictures and videos of Emma than would be practical to list here.  And I guess that’s all that’s worth mentioning from this most recent trip around the sun.  May you all have a happy new year!

Now that 2007 is then rather than now, it’s time to look at some of the things that happened then.

The year began with a review of 2006.  Much like the one you are reading now!  By the way, I apparently write like a girl.  I got a chance to eat lunch with my boss’s boss’s boss’s boss’s boss.  I may have miscounted the number of bosses but it’s something like that.  I named a new medical condition, frigidamanus supermus.  Doctors and scientists are still trying to catch up.  My niece—only 6.5 months old at the time—learned to play the ukulele, with yours truly as an instructor.  Around Easter, Stephanie took a shortcut to the bottom of a staircase.  She saved some time but broke her foot in the process.  I made some observations last summer, and now everyone thinks I’m a racist.  Oops.  We bought a house, and just five months later got around to posting some photos of said dwelling.  I theorized a bit on human eyes, and soon reported additional evidence in a follow-up post.  My right eye dominates both of yours.

Then of course there was the big news.  Stephanie has a parasite living in her abdomen, which we found out lacks sufficient organs needed to be called a he.  So when she joins us in March, hopefully her father will be up to the task of raising her.

Some other things happened last year too.  The sixth anniversary of 9/11 occurred, and I posted my account of that fateful day for all to read.  I also visited the top-left corner of the lower forty-eight, where I worked with some aeroplanists.  Shortly after that I got a year older, something which unfortunately happens every year.  Hopefully scientists get around to inventing immortality pills soon.

Aside from that, I made several posts about things that I spend time with.  These included some video game reviews, as well as some other video-game-related posts.  I also geeked out on Lost for a couple posts.  Who or what is Jacob!?  I think he’s Superman, and Lost Island is his new Fortress of Solitude.  That’s gotta be it.  Let’s see, what else...  I made several posts regarding software development, and a couple posts to make the internets better.  I also posted some comments on pop culture in what I am calling the “OMG dju hear” series.  Expect to see more in that series from time to time.

If you like to look at other people’s photos, three photo albums were posted this year.  Feel free to check those out.

Lastly, I have to mention the series of five posts where I dug up my old drawings from middle school.  I was apparently pretty demented.

Enjoy 2008.

Over the weekend (Saturday in fact!) yours truly completed his twenty-sixth lap around the sun.  The only thing I know of that changes on your twenty-sixth birthday is that you can no longer be drafted.  Of course, they aren’t drafting anyone nowadays, but if they started doing it again I’d be safe.  Unless of course Congress changed the rules, which I believe they are perfectly capable of doing.  In any case, I’m continuing to get older.  Somehow on this year’s birthday I actually felt more than a day older.  It seems absolutely impossible that a full year has passed since I passed the quarter-century mark.  And it’s not that I haven’t done anything all year.  I guess it’s that I have done a lot of “grown-up” stuff in the last year.  I bought a house, for example.  I went on a business trip.  I started making mortgage payments.  I filed my own taxes.  And the big one, of course, is that I’m going to be a father in four months.  A dad.  This guy is going to be responsible for the life of another human being.  I mean, we are talking about a person who not only created a drawing of a guy in a giant toilet riding a turd, but he posted said turd cowboy onto the various internets.  That’s just craziness.

Maybe, just maybe—with the help of her seemingly sane mother—my daughter will turn out to be more than a demented sociopath.

Yee-Ha!

Well the calendar companies have again tricked us all into shelling out even more money for astrological tables which focus on the earth’s location relative to the sun.  So according to an ancient tradition which dates back nearly a year, I will review some of the adventures I have been through with you, faithful reader of my boring blog.

Let’s see...  there was that time I got ripped off on eBay, although technically that happened in 2005.  But I didn’t blog about it until 2006 so it still counts.  Then I critiqued some xenophobic e-mail, shortly before I influenced the direction of American television.  I listed a few of my favorite things, for all to see and marvel at.  Later Stephanie interviewed for and was subsequently offered a job.  But in between those two events, we ate a year-old pastry.  Once we had another source of income we bought a new car.  A few months later I bought a new amp and rocked super hard.  I built the most complex sand castle I’ve ever built, but sadly it could not stand up to the incoming tide.  As the summer was winding down, I let you all in on twenty-six video games that I think are totally cool, before letting you in on a little secret: this is where I work.  Next, I became an uncle at the same time that Stephanie became an aunt, when our new niece began to independently consume some of the extra oxygen in the atmosphere.  Stephanie made a list, focusing on movies, and then I jumped on board the MySpace bandwagon thing.  Just when I was starting to feel like a cool young dude, I got a year older.  But at least I won a hot blonde girl bean bag chair to ease my aging back.  To finish up the year I finished a project that was two years in the making, before being robbed by some stupid teenagers.

Nothing changes on New Year’s Day
—Bono (greatest rock star, humanitarian, philanthropist, and savior ever to call himself all of those things)

Today marks one quarter of one century that yours truly has graced this planet with his presence.  In honor of this momentous occasion, I will now discuss things that I pledge, as an aging person, not to say in the coming twenty-five years.

The problem with America today is ...
I do not believe that getting older means you’ve suddenly figured everything out.  Do you know how many topics have been identified as the problem with America?  Seven hundred and thirty four different topics, according to statistics I just made up.  I think it is plain to see that the world is very complex.  I won’t let myself fall under the assumption that the world is constantly degrading.  If anything I think they are improving (despite what the news tells you).

Kids these days have it too easy.
You may have also heard this stated like this:  “When I was a kid I had to walk to school.  In the snow.  Barefoot!  Uphill!!  BOTH WAYS!!!”  It is a tired cliché, and old people seem to jump on it left and right.  Political candidates have used it to win votes for a very long time.  Yeah, technology is making a lot of things easier (and isn’t that what we want anyway?), but there will always be new challenges to kids that their elders didn’t even have to worry about.  Like how my grandparents didn’t have to worry about getting germs from black people when using a public water fountain, but my generation is constantly assailed with negro germs.

The last good band was The Smashing Pumpkins, the last entertaining video game was Super Mario 64, and the last funny movie was Happy Gilmore.
This is a big one, and I refuse—I repeat: refuse!—to succumb to the notion that somehow I happened to be fifteen years old when all the best bands, movies, TV shows, and video games came out.  I’m not sure what causes people to think this way as they age, but I think we have all seen it time and time again.  I’m not saying I will be one of those old people who tries to pretend he’s one of the cool kids (like that guy who graduated high school two years before you, but he would still hang out in the parking lot after school, and as far as you know he still does).  I’m just saying I won’t act like I lived in some kind of magical golden age where nothing sucked.  I guess people only remember the things they like, and they replay those things in their mind over and over.  When these memories—ripened into nostalgia by years of rumination—are placed against fresh, unfiltered new media...  well, there is no contest.  In the coming twenty-five years I will attempt to be conscious of the fact that things might not have been as good as I remember them.  I have already started this process.  For instance, as much I would like to, I will not assert that Animaniacs is somehow more sophisticated that SpongeBob SquarePants, or that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles has a better premise than Pokémon.  I think only the eight-year-old me and a modern eight-year-old could take up that argument.  Presumably with nunchucks and Pokéballs.

Well there you have it.  Originally the list was longer, but there was a lot of redundancy.  Basically everything boiled down to “new stuff sucks” and “there is no hope for our kids.”  I will strive to keep these campaign goals, and in twenty-five years I will present a status report, evaluating my performance in achieving these goals.  Stay tuned!

Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these?”  For it is not wise to ask such questions.
—Ecc 7:10

Last Sunday was our first anniversary (it’s is crazy to think it’s been a year already!).  We spent the weekend at my uncle’s mountain house on Roan Mountain.  It was a nice break from Charlotte.  It was also my first time there since almost six years ago.  I put up a set of pictures from the trip, for all who may care to see them.  One thing I need to comment on is the year old cake that we ate for our anniversary.  Amazingly, it was still moist and tasted good.  Stephanie’s mom did a good job of wrapping it up somehow so that it didn’t get freezer burn.  I was pretty scared before taking the first bite.

Well I thought I had more to say about the trip but I guess not... enjoy the photos!

We got older but we’re still young